Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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