I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
