chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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