she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
