My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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