this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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