there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize