I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
