I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
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For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
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He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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