still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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