All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Randomize