do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
