it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Randomize
