He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize