I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize