Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
