I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
