we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
