And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
