garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Randomize
