Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I must be too annoying 4 u.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
