If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
