you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
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Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
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It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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