the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
