your thong is hanging out like whoa
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
