I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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