What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I'm way too hungover for life right now
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
i out mim tonsoeep
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
