Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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