Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
