She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
