Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
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