i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
