The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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