At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
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