just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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