maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
