Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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