just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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