its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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