Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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