She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize