I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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