Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
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