would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
