That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
