think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize