would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I booty called her while she was in labor.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Randomize
