SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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