I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Randomize
