that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
