i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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