normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize