I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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